I’ve not really felt like I’ve been my best self lately. I’m not happy about or proud of this.
For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been angry and irritated and impatient and intolerant and sarcastic and potty-mouthed and snarky and frustrated and tearful and pretty negative all round. I’ve been withdrawn and I’ve bailed on team sporting commitments. I’ve been tired all the time, and I’ve not been making good food choices.
Work has been unpredictable and stressful for some time, and all the change and uncertainty has left me feeling anxious and generally uneasy – but this is really no excuse. This is just not me.
I’ve been a real wet blanket. I don’t even want to be around me lately, so I don’t know how others have tolerated me.
Ordinarily, I am a pretty cheerful person; even when things are tough I can usually manage to slap a smile on my face and muster a little enthusiasm. Lately, I’ve barely tried. I know I certainly can’t be upbeat all the time, however I do think there is something to be said for always doing your best. While one’s “best” is of course bound to change depending on how one is feeling in that moment, even stressed and tired, I know I could be putting in more effort.
The only thing that is certain right now is that the next few weeks will continue to be exhausting and stressful.